PAYTON'S PREDICTIONS: What Kinda Friend Are You?

♈ Aries – The Instigator 💥

The one who hypes up every bad decision. “Just text him, what’s the worst that could happen?” “Bet you won’t chug that.” “Let’s sneak into VIP.” Absolute chaos follows you, and somehow, you always survive unscathed.

♉ Taurus – The Foodie 🍕

You’re the friend who always needs a snack and won’t go anywhere without knowing the food situation first. If there’s free food, you will be first in line. Also, you take food orders very seriously—mess up a Taurus order, and you’re dead to them.

♊ Gemini – The One Who Knows Everyone 🗣️

You can’t go anywhere without a Gemini running into someone they know. “OMG, I went to kindergarten with them!” They’re the ultimate social butterfly, but also? They love drama and will absolutely be the first to say, “You wanna know what I heard?”

♋ Cancer – The Therapist 🫂

The designated “Are you okay?” friend. You’re always ready to listen, give advice, and hug your friends while they cry at the pregame over your ex (again). But the second YOU get emotional? You disappear into your room for three business days.

♌ Leo – The Main Character 🎬

The one who makes everything an event. You plan the group outfits, you get the VIP table, and you refuse to be ignored. They also insist on taking 500 pictures, and guess what? Everyone will sit there while you pick the perfect one.

♍ Virgo – The Mom Friend 📝

You have Advil, hand sanitizer, and an entire itinerary in your bag. You know everyone’s Uber rating, and you always check the Yelp reviews before picking a restaurant. If you’re drunk at 2 AM, you’re the one ordering your Lyft home.

♎ Libra – The Flirt 💋

You can’t not flirt, even with the waiter or someone’s dad. The ultimate matchmaker, but somehow, you’re always in a messy “situationship.” You also take forever to get ready, but no one can even be mad because you always look flawless.

♏ Scorpio – The Mysterious One 👀

You show up when they feel like it, and no one ever really knows what’s going on in your life. You’re the friend who was in Europe for a month and no one even knew until you posted a photo dump on Instagram. You know all the group secrets but only reveal what you want people to know.

♐ Sagittarius – The Unreliable One ✈️

The “I’m on my way” friend… who is absolutely not on their way. You say you’ll come to brunch, but suddenly, you’re backpacking in another country. When you do show up, though? They bring the best stories and the wildest energy.

♑ Capricorn – The Responsible One 📊

You make the reservations, set the alarms, and remember birthdays. You’re the “this is why we can’t have nice things” friend. When things get out of hand, you’re the one dragging people out before they embarrass themselves.

♒ Aquarius – The Wild Card 🚀

You disappear mid-party and show up three hours later with a totally new friend group. You say things like, “Let’s just see where the night takes us.” I wouldn’t doubt that you’ve convinced your friends to go on a road trip in the middle of the night.

♓ Pisces – The Emotional One 😭

The friend who starts deep convos in the Uber at 2 AM. You’re the friend that randomly says “ do you guys really think soulmates exist and do you believe in twin flames?” If you drink, you’re either falling in love with a stranger or crying about something from 2014. No in-between.


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